fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
he fucked my hip out of place.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
