I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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