Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.