Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Randomize
