Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
When did angry sex become our thing?
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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