Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
