We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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