love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
