ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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