In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize