Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize