Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
