The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
