Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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