We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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