i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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