Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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