i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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