Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Randomize