just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
