He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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