just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
