I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize