no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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