I swear she didn't look like that last week.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
