well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
