i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
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