all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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