Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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