if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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