I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
