We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
My bed smells like the plague
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Randomize
