I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Randomize
