no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
