So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
