Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Randomize