I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize