What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
