I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
