There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I have aggressive nipples.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
