She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
