This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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