I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Randomize
