dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Randomize
