i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize