Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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