just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
