fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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