She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
