D3 body, D1 cock
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Randomize