one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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