my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
You're a waste of cheezeits
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Randomize